4 Steps to Making Anything Better
You know the feeling right before you walk into a job interview?
Or walking in the restaurant to meet a blind date?
Or the day before you go on vacation trying to shove 5 days of work into the last 4 hours of your day?
Most people find these things to be nerve-wracking, cause serious anxiety and maybe even down-right terrifying.
Good news. There’s a simple process to make these things better.
Set your intention to be whatever you want your reality to be.
Intention gives you purpose.
Intention is what makes you take action.
Intention is your starting point and your personal GPS.
Intention is the guiding force that will help you feel more powerful and have more clarity.
Intention makes you unstoppable and THAT shit will make ANYTHING better!
Set Your Intentions. Every. Damn. Day.
- Long commute
- Pointless meetings
- Tough conversation
- Job interview
- Buying a new house or a car
- Family reunion
- First date
- Asking for a raise
- Paying bills
Four-Step Tool to Set Your Intention
Step 1: Who do you want to be?
Think of these as the Personal Qualities you wish for yourself in this stressful situation.
- That tough conversation you need to have. “I want to be courageous.”
- That interview you’re walking into. “I want to show I am a knowledgeable and capable.”
- First date and you’re nervous? “I want to be confident.”
Envision who you want to be.
Adventurous. Witty. Generous. Reliable. Honest. Gentle.
Here’s a handy-dandy list of qualities in case you need a starting point!
Step 2: How do you want to feel?
Let’s be clear. You don’t feel stressed out because you WANT TO. Some might even say feeling stress is a choice – the option to NOT feel stressed is probably available to you if you choose it. All of this depends on how you want to feel. YES, you can in fact TELL YOURSELF how you want to feel. YOU are in control of your thoughts. [read that last sentence again, because you probably need to]
Feelings no longer “happen” to you when you choose them.
- Heading to your first workout in a while? “I want to feel confident and centered.”
- Long commute to work? “I don’t love this drive but I’m so grateful I have a job to go to.”
- Preparing for vacation? Do you WANT to be a stressed out lunatic? No! “I want to feel calm and organized to start my vacation off on the right foot.”
The power plant doesn’t GET energy. It CREATES energy.
Your are in complete control of the energy that helps you create who you want to be and how you want to feel. Moving on.
Step 3: What is your desired outcome in this situation?
Think of this as your Internal Goal. You’re not in control of other people, their thoughts, their feelings, their actions or their intentions.
However, making these hard situations better requires you to set YOUR thoughts, YOUR feelings, and ultimately YOUR intention.
Let’s say you have been asked to attend a networking event and as much as you like people, this kind of thing stresses you out. Ask yourself “when I walk away from this [event] I want [fill in the blank].”
Now it sounds like this: “It’s okay that this kind of event stresses me out but when I walk away I want to be more informed and connected / learn a new skill / meet new people!”
The good news is that your internal goal has nothing to do with other people – this is YOUR intention so it’s YOUR goal.
Step 4: What is the best case scenario?
This is about your Preferences. This is your personal Home Run. Your Grand-Freaking-Slam.
You’re heading to a family reunion and the last one was about as enjoyable as a root canal, so you’re basically dreading this.
This time set your intention for what the best family reunion would look like it if was perfect.
If the whole thing is a complete success you….
enjoy a few hours/days with some cousins you’ve never even met before,
remember how good Grandma’s chocolate chip cookies are,
sat without your phone and didn’t take one picture of your food (okay, you probably did take a selfie with your grandma, but whatever, you get the point).
What does a the best case scenario look like and feel like for you?
Own your intentions. Own your life.
Before any event, meeting or even before you leave the house for the day, get clear about your intentions.
Bonus points if you write it down. There is magic in pen to paper!
What is the situation?
Who do you want to be?
How do you want to feel?
What is your internal goal?
What is the best case scenario?
Keep me posted on your progress friends!